Too Little, Too Late

This week is crazy intense, but i don't want that to harm our beautiful relationship that we've developed here. I went shopping with my mother today, so a haul should be up pretty soon. My life is really quite boring since I decided upon moving on and not looking back. That doesn't mean I regret doing so, because for now I really need my focus to be on school work and studies rather than on a stupid guy that only hurts me (true about most of the time), but still I wish some excitement came my way, because these days feel quite empty right now. I wake up, go to school, come home, maybe do something small, finish school work or study for a test and then go through the process of getting ready to sleep, and, on a good day, falling asleep fast.
I have these weird periods of time when I don't sleep all too well or all too much, and then I have these weird, crazy, freaky, and really creepy dreams. All sorts of dreams like walking with my friends in a field and reaching a house with a lawn and then the house suddenly explodes and all sorts of things like that that I really have no idea where they come from.
I went to a friend's birthday party today, and it was a lot of fun. We, 15 friends or so, sat at a restaurant for dinner and chatted and stuff. I really like those evenings when it's not so boring. I like having social life I guess. Sounds like I'm human. Oh darn.
I talked to my beloved guitar teacher about getting back into the guitar playing thing. I haven't had the time this year to really play around with it, but I hope that I can go back to it during the summer. My guitar teacher is the nicest, sweetest, most intelligent man I have ever come to meet. He's quite old and I honestly feel like he's my grandfather. My life has been full of adopted grandparents since all of my grandparent died well before I was born. I can honestly say I feel them being there for me and helping me in my everyday life, but sometimes I do miss that role in my life, and my guitar teacher does that very well for me. He teaches me far beyond the music and into all the arts and the important facts of life. Recently he has lost his wife and while she was sick he couldn't really give me any lessons, and then I got busy and our connection got a little lost from there on out, but I do need him in my life.
The loss of my first nanny this year and the upcoming loss of my beloved dog, as weird as that may sound, shook me a little bit to remind me how much I don't want to miss out on the people I love most in life. I'd never lost someone close to my heart up until this year when my first nanny died. She was very close to our family and has been battling with diabetes and all of its outcomes for years now, but, since I'd never lost anybody that close to me beforehand, I took her existence on this earth and by my side for granted. A week or two before she passed both my sister and my mother went to visit her not knowing that the end is this close, and I didn't come. Looking back, during her funeral, I realized how sorry I am that I had missed out on having a last day with her before she was gone from my eyes forever. It struck me really hard that people are temporary, and that every moment spent with someone you love should really be treasured.
 My dog has been diagnosed with some kind of cancer, and to some people that might sound stupid and cliche, but the truth is she is as human to me as many other people around me aren't. She is so good to people, so kind, and so intelligent, loving and caring. I know that once she's gone it will be another hard loss on me because I've had her now for about 11 years, and she's so dear and close to my heart that I really can't let that go.

I hope that my guitar teacher's life is as long as possible, but I know that, after he has lost his wife, that wish is very selfish. He loved her very much, so I imagine that life without her is really hard on him, but I want him to be there for me forever, because he has taught me so much and been there for me through my toughest years when I was rejected by so called friends and humiliated a lot.
The losses that I've both experienced and will experience soon, I guess, have both made me come to the conclusion that I should spend more time with him, get back to playing, get back to learning music and all other things from this amazing man before it's too late.

Don't do things you know you will regret doing and don't miss out on people you know you won't regret meeting. 




Here for another outfit of the day :D Cheers! 
My cardigan is from Forever 21 and it is striped black and gray. The lacy tank top is from Aerie. I love lingerie tops (as long as they don't expose any unnecessary parts of your body. They are lacy and feminine and a good quality. Rings as usual. The necklace is from a local store. Hit up the comment section if you want a more detailed answer. The jeans are my Lee Cooper, high rise, light blue washed jeans.
That's basically all.

Gone With The Math Wind

As the title claims, I am here for now. The next few weeks until the very end of the school year are going to be a hurricane, so please don't be disappointed if there's a week with only one post coming up or even less, and especially not the more decorated put together posts, because I have so many tests that my mind's burning up.
This week I have chem test and two math tests that I really am trying not to be too stressed about, because frankly that's what screws me up and makes me fail miserably (not that I actually fail, but I've been getting bad scores because of stressing myself out), so, you girls, wish me luck, please!
How have you been? To my sad impression you don't really like leaving comments which I would love to get. Don't worry about being good at English or whatever, because that, honestly, doesn't matter to me at all.
I am taking pictures of outfit of the days all the time for you, though not really able to take the time and do a real post to my awful dismay.
Other than that things haven't really changed, gone wrong, or gone fabulous. I don't have any boy drama, thank whatever higher force you believe in if you do. School is a little stressful, but I mean it could be because I just had a really long spring break, and I'm just not used to working my bum off. Yet. My family is great actually. Dad decided to stop smoking, which in my opinion is a great thing that will be healthy for us as a family and individually, and especially good for him. I am very proud of that life choice he has taken. My friends and I all made up (the ones I had fights with), and I really am just happy with my place in the food chain right now. I feel almost like a T-Rex, a super omnivore. I am honestly trying my best at not letting things get to me.
I am optimistic, very, which is a good thing for me to be at this point. I mean usually towards the end of the school year I am powerless, but this year I'm charging up to go at it full force.
Now here are three outfits from these past not so few days:

The first outfit was worn on an extremely humid day, and therefore I didn't wear any jewelery, but I did go to see 21 Jump Street, which was HILARIOUS, so try to go out and see it. An added plus is that Channing Tatum is extremely attractive, and I'm shallow like that. Hence the sweater in case I get cold in the theater, and I always get cold in the theater. The cardigan is from Zara and it has been featured more time than the dear beloved queen waves her hand in one day. The T-shirt is just an old T-shirt of my sister's that has a yellow cab on it and, I really like it. The shoes I was wearing are my Aldo black sandals that cannot be replaced in my heart, as far as my eyes have seen up until now.

This next outfit was worn on a day home when I didn't feel like putting too much effort into. I wore my mom's mint tank top with lace trimming at the neck that I steal all the time. Again I didn't wear any jewelery just because I was really lazy and was just solving math tests for nobody to hear or see. The shorts are from last summer's Urban Outfitter's collection. They're dotted all over, high waisted and have scalloped edges. The little short-sleeved cardigan is from Topshop, and I don't love it, but still I needed color. I didn't really wear shoes, because my feet love their freedom when possible.

The last outfit for today is an outfit I wore to school, and it has an autumn-ish vibe to it, but really it felt a lot like a fall day that day. I centered it around the necklace that I bought in a local boutique (for more information about the boutiques I shop at send me a comment so that I can answer you later more privately). I wore a plain gray T-shirt from Old Navy, which I always buy my basic T's from, with some high waisted denim shorts, again from a local store. Under the shorts I wore black tights and I paired them up with my shoes from Urban Outfitters that I saw Ivy from 90210 wearing in the last episode I think that came out, or the one before, and got really stupidly fan girly excited about it. That girl is a style icon for me, although I would never be able to imitate her. Other than that I wore all my regular rings and my lucky bracelet my dad bought me.

Anyways I really am desperate for your replies and thoughts and so on so please comment. Remember that "wherever I go, each moment away, I'm missing you more than I can say" as the lovely Karima Francis says in her addictive song "Wherever I Go". Have an awesome week! XOXO Roni J.

Pep Talk? Random Talk?

Hello hello there,
Today again was a warm sunny day and I enjoyed it very much. It is a stressful week for being a break, but you do what you have to do. Since it is very stressful, two of my friends and I decided to have a girls night. Just like a sleepover, but better. Doing our nails, eating sushi, watching a sweet chick flick that makes us all cry, gossip, and eat some more. I think this is one of my favorite things to do with friends. It's just so funny and fun, so what if it's for little girls. Count me in.

I hope you guys are having an awesome week and if not, then remember that it's Thursday, this means you have to hold on through another day or so, and then the weekend arrives, you can let go of the stress and just breathe. Always remember that every penny has two sides. If you only look at the dirty nasty side than you're missing the whole picture. Look for the other side in things, because that's what's gonna make you happy. Not other people, not materialistic things, no success, no nothing will make you happy other than the way you look at life. If you choose to embrace it, and look for the bright light spots, than you'll see them, you'll enjoy them much more. Although, if you look for everything that's bad and sad and gloomy, then that's what you'll see.
Be the girl that always know what she wants when she sees it, and that always gets what she wants. In this case it's the easiest thing to see, want, and achieve. Light.
Today's outfit:
My shirt is a lacy, blue print with flowers tank top. I adore it since it's from a distant boutique in the middle of nowhere, so nobody will have the same top, and it's also very unique since it's not actual lace, but just a print.

The shorts are just light washed, high waisted shorts that I don't know where I got, but they're everywhere so I'm sure that if you want a pair then you can go find one.
My cardigan is from a brand that sells in TJ max,  I think, or maybe at Target, called Tweeds, and it is the perfect brown, since it is lively and not just dark.
My necklace is from Accessorize, and you're probably tired of me wearing it, but whatevz. Ja'dore.
Other than that my shoes are my brown loafers, moccasins, whatever you wish, from Aldo and the rest of my jewelery is the same as every day!
 Thank you girlies for reading. Leave anything you want (good, bad, worse) in the comments below, and maybe take time to take the poll in the side bar=>
<3 Byyyeee!!

Knowing

Hey there girls!
Hope your week is starting alright. Mine is quite stressful. Tomorrow I have a huge math test, and  while I don't have test anxiety, math tests just murder me mentally and emotionally.
Anyways this time we're talking about yesterday, because, well, that's more interesting than my math filled day :D. Yesterday I walked home from school, and these are the kinds of situations where I do most of my thinking. Up until yesterday I couldn't really put what I was feeling about the whole situation with the boy, but while I was walking a few words came to mind, and seconds later I found myself at the door to my house, something that should have lasted 20 minutes, when my face is stuck to the notes app on my iPhone.
I just wrote everything I had to tell him in a note, erased it, rewrote it, read it to myself, corrected it, revised it, and by the time I was done, my nose was literally touching the door. I feel like writing it to myself is not enough, so I thought I'd share, if you don't mind of course. If you do, than scroll down to the OOTD.
This is my letter to him:
" I used to feel like I know you. Even in when in our lowest points I at least felt as if we were acquainted. I used to know when to expect you. I used to know what your next move might be. I used to  know how to make you notice me, and what would make you laugh.
Today, well, today things are different. To be entirely honest and truthful, they have been different for quite some time. If at a certain point I used to feel like I know you, why then today I wouldn't even dare think that. If I ever used to feel like we're acquainted, these days you're a complete stranger to me. If I used to know when to expect you and what to expect from you, then what now? Now, now you surprise me time and time again, or may I say you shock me. If you used to make my heart race, why then these day are gone, and now you make my heart drop. I don't know you and sincerely doubt I ever did. You have indeed proven yourself as quite the actor in the past, but I just didn't think it would apply to real life, or didn't want to think that.
You have proven me wrong. If I had really known you from the very start, I wouldn't have fallen for you".
Thanks for letting me get that out of the way.
Yesterday I also watched the Hunger Games movie. To tell you the honest truth, it really wasn't as good as the book. Although, in comparison to other books turned into movies, it was really fantastic. I mean, if I hadn't known the plot and hadn't known how amazing the book series is and hadn't cried while reading each and every book like a baby, then this movie would have just been ten times better in my mind. I cried like a baby during the movie, too, but just not as much. The movie over all is really good and I do recommend watching it even to those of us who have read the books.


This is what I wore to the movies: 
Shirt is from United Colors of Benetton.
Cardigan is from Zara, and it is really warm cozy, because I usually freeze to death in theaters, so I needed something chunky.
Purse is from the brand Let Them Eat Cake, it is tiny, yet everything fits into it which is why I love it for the movies.
Jeans are my Topshop acid washed jeans, and I  know it looks like I'm always wearing this, but I really don't, plus they're so versatile that who gives a crap.
Jewelery is just the regular combination, no necklace, cause I didn't feel like being dressy for just a movie with a friend.
Shoes are my usual combat boots which I DO wear all the time but they're just so comfortable that it's hard to take them off my feet :).

This is a song for not stressing out!
Love you all and don't worry, be happy. 

Spring Cleaning

Hey girlies,
so so  sorry I haven't put up a post these past few days, but I felt a little... Down I guess, and just needed a little downtime quietly for myself. Anyways I have absolutely no idea why I was feeling down, I mean I actually felt relieved, and it's not that time of month if you know what I mean ;)
Has it ever happened to you that you had absolutely no reason to be down, and period bitchy like without having any reason.
It might have actually been the relief from the past weeks that have been a little eventful with all sorts of fears and stress and hard work with school and a broken heart I was trying to mend, that the one day I came early from school and didn't have as much weight on, I decided to just let it all out.
In order to let it out I just set in front of the new episode of One Tree Hill, and cried my inner guts out even in the happy moments. I got my insides washed with a good cry, and then headed straight to the shower to wash my outer me. It's like a spring cleaning kinda ritual.
I think that since I have break soon from school, that I better start the spring cleaning of my closet, of my room, of my school work in order to get ready for the big finals coming up soon.
Any tips on spring cleaning? If you have any, please leave them below so that not only can I get a little bit of spring cleaning done, but also the rest of the girls reading this blog, hopefully by now there are a few.


OOTD, don't let it fool you, it's not from today I just hadn't the time and will power to get on the computer in order to upload.
Orange sweater is from United Colors of Benetton, and it is one of my favorites, especially these days when I'm trying to make myself feel a little more bright and happy.
Jeans are my acid washed jeans from Topshop that I love with all my heart. For some odd reason in the past two years I've been reaching light washed and acid washed jeans a whole lot more than dark washed jeans.

Jewellery is the regular bracelet and rings, but with the addition of a wooden necklace shaped like a banana from a local designer and a cuff made by the same girl that has two golden lines that have engraved snake skin shapes into it (being up with the snake skin trend without hurting any snakes) with a golden leopard on it (without hurting any leopards).
The earrings are just hoops that have a bunch of smaller hoops going through them looking kinda pirate-y, arrg. I love them for being so simple yet unique.
Shoes are the sneakers they sell at Urban Outfitters for the cheapest prices that I have two pairs of with a different print. This pair has an Aztec-y colorful with pastels print, and they are so comfortable it's unbelievable.
Hope you guys enjoyed this post and the many more that I plan on putting up tomorrow hopefully! Have a wonderful weekend, and let's clean out everything so that we can start this spring the right way. For questions and just a little chit chat write me a comment. I swear I won't bite.

I've really been into the cheesy-feel-good-love songs lately in order to make me, well, feel good and loved :D. This is a song by the amazingly talented (and extremely good looking) Teddy Geiger. Hope you like!

Free Style- The Style of Freedom!

Spring is coming faster and faster, creeping upon us without us even noticing it is knocking on our door. Spring's a good season to start daring, to make new choices in every department, to look for new things we truly love, and to "Do What Feels Good", as many smarted people have said well before me.
I am personally loving this spring's new and old trends. From metallics to colorblocking, from florals to Aztec print let's not even skip one. And if I am missing a spring trend that you personally love and want people to know all about you're welcome to write it in the comments below and make us all more knowledgeable!- Seriously, I would appreciate it!
So here is the list:
1. Continuing on from the winter the trend of metallics, which I personally adore, is following us into spring. Brushed metal, gold, silver, rose gold or really any metallic color work!
2. Gladiators, strappy sandals, make me happy to look at!

Here's a shoe that combines both metallics and gladiators:








3. Now, let's head into the one trend that no other trend says summer like. The FLORALS! One of my personal favorites that will probably never go out of style for this season!
4. Another beautiful yet a little revealing trend is the cropped tops. It took me a while to get used to them and still I don't wear them if they show too much skin but if you're comfortable with showing skin then I say YOU GO GIRL!
Here's a top that combines them both:





5. A trend so trendy every year is the OH SO FAMOUS DRESSES that, I, personally missed wearing during the cold wet months. Obviously this won't ever go away thank the dear fashion police.
6. A trend that, correct me if I'm wrong, came in last summer, and is still up and running is colorblocking. Spring's best feature is colors. Why not play it off?
7. The best hemline there ever was is the high-low hemline. Much like a mullet except reverted is the party mini in the front and business midi in the back!

Here's A dress that combines all three:










6. Crazy patterns are always and will always be in my favorites! They are so versatile and make any outfit special!
7. Button ups that are sheer are coming into spring with us as they are light and airy and fit even the hottest and most humid times of day!
8. Another trend that I've come to love is the collars trend, and especially the Peter Pan collar!
Here's a Peter Pan collared shirt that's sheer and has a crazy flamingo pattern!:

9. Shorts are a must-have item in the summer wardrobe. Especially light washed denim shorts and crazy, eye-catching short.
10. Light denim anything is my love for summer. Denim is such a light material that in the winter it might be even a little too cold to wear, but here comes the sun.
11. Me love me some high waisted pants. They suck in the stomach and make you appear longer (which in my case is not at all needed but is still accepted).
12. Lace is also very popular lately. Such a feminine fabric that makes anything look more dressy, and sexy.
Here are the lacy high waisted shorts:        Here are high waisted light washed shorts:
                                         Here are some crazy pants ;) :

I have basically run out of ideas although I'm a 100% sure there are far more trends than I can come up with. If you think of anything, leave it in the comments below!
Adore you guys!
 'Cause here comes the sun and I say: "It's all right"

XOXO Roni J.