New Hair's Resolutions

Hello hello their my dear readers!

Are we well today? I sure hope we are! My birthday is nearly here, which means we're nearing the end of this stupid birthday month that's bringing us down. I decided that I will enjoy this birthday no matter how much I hate getting older, and how much I love my Peter Pan-like life. Yes, I do wish I could stay young forever, but I also do think it's a choice you make within yourself. You can act all grumpy and old like you're nearing the end of your life- kinda like I have been acting recently, but you can also choose to laugh and have a sense of humor about it, and be young and youthful. Worries are for the old. If you want to be young forever you mustn't worry, because that would be defeating the purpose. So let's not defeat the purpose, and let's live like we're dying while we're young. That could be a really fun mash up. Think about it. Or maybe it's just me.

Anyways I really thought I should focus on other things other than guys in the meantime, so I'm going to focus on my hair. Yes, on my hair.

I am in love with ombre, and it adds so much character to my hair, but it also burnt the ends, and made my hair less soft, and way more dry, which bothers me so much. I hate split ends. Hate them.

So I decided to gain a new routine for myself. I have never really had a hair routine. I just brushed my hair with a brush. I had shampoo and conditioner, but never really cared too much about the kind of hair they were targeted at, and never had any other products I used before or after.

To be honest I never really use heat on my hair and therefore my hair is fairly healthy to begin with.

Here are my steps and tips for healthy hair starting January 2013:

1) Use no heat. Yes, it's a step I already follow but for all of you out there. Heat's gonna burn your hair and make it split and frizz. Don't we all want it to be healthy and shiny though? We do. Take it away from your routine as much as possible. Air and towel dry your hair, curl it in braids, and so on.

If you still decide to use heat:

*Use a diffuser on the blow dryer. It will distribute the heat evenly through your hair rather than put a lot of heat on some parts of your hair.

*Lower the heat setting. You don't need 500 degrees in order to straighten your hair.

*Use heat protectant on your hair. My favorite, which I have recently run out of after a long time's service is TRESemmé's Thermal Creations Heat Tamer Spray (that's a mouthful.. Good thing I'm writing it).  Apply it to your hair before you style it with heat. I personally rarely use it, but I like it a lot. 

2) Use less products on your hair. Not only do they make your scalp unhealthy by either drying it up, oiling it up, or both, and whatever affects your scalp will affect your hair, as well,  but it can also weigh down your hair and make it look really flat. Use the minimum amount of products, and check to see if you really need another balm, hair spray, or mousse.

3) Check to see if the products you are using are suited to your hair type. For example, if mine is dry, damaged, and colored, I will use products targeted at that. My shampoo and conditioner combo are the  Dry Scalp Care by Head & Shoulders, and recently changed conditioner is Full Restore conditioner by Elvive. They both help with the dry situation on my hair and scalp especially in the winter months that are always far more dry for my skin as a whole, and for my hair. 

4) Use a deep conditioning treatment once a week or once every two weeks depending on how thirsty your hair is. I personally use Elvive's matching Full Restore mask once a week instead of a regular conditioner and it makes an incredible change in how soft my hair is. It doesn't make my hair oily at all which is a great plus, and it is fairly affordable.  

5) Don't wash your hair all the time. This is a huge mistake a lot of my friends made. Give your hair and scalp a break in between washes of at least a day, because washing it strips it of its moisture, and makes your scalp produce more and more oil. Start breaking your washes slowly and you will notice your hair doesn't get as oily as fast. 

6) Comb through it with care. Don't, if possible, use brushes on it, and definitely not when it wet and more fragile. Use a wide toothed comb after the shower to take the knots out of it. I use a wooden one I got at the Body Shop. It doesn't break your hair as easily as a brush. And don't finger comb through your hair because you will be ripping and breaking your hairs trying to take down the knots. When your hair is dry and knotty use a Tangle Teezer. These make my life a blast. It is so gentle, and easy to work with. It doesn't pull your hair out, which is something I despise about brushes. Finally, start brushing at the bottom of your hair and slowly move up. Don't start at the top because it will bunch all of the knots together at the bottom and it will make it dreadful to brush through, and break your hair like nothing else.

7) Change you parting every once in a while. It will stimulate the roots a little, and help your hair grow.

8) Last but not least try not to put too much pressure on it. Ponytails are comfortable, I know, but they break your hair and make it frizz at the top if the height of the ponytail isn't varied often. Try to use bobby pins that don't pull your hair for every updo, but if you're like me and you like simplicity, or are sporty, only use elasttics that are NOT made made of plain rubber, use ones with the fabric-y finish, and don't use ones that have metal part, because they both tear easily, and break and pull your hair. They sell quite good ones at H&M, and at every drugstore. Compare prices and see which one's better.

Hope this was helpful! I also hope you devote yourself for good causes rather than stick to drama. I love you, and as Ellen says "be kind to one another"! Tomorrow is the big 18 :) <3 XOXO Roni J. 

I'm a believer

Hello there. How are we today? I hope that better than I am today.
If you were, by any chance, wondering why I'm down, it's because I feel insanely stupid. Yesterday a friend blurted out by mistake about the girl that Mr. Guy wants, a fact that she so conveniently forgot to mention. So then I'm dumbfounded by the fact that he wants another girl, because I practically convinced myself in the past few months that everything he does and says has to have some meaning as for the fact that he is possibly in love with me but hiding it. I mean that's a pretty story and all but that's not what's there. He's not secretly crushing on me or he would have found the chance and showed it to me. He's a man whore therefore I do not believe that he has any problem to put himself out there without showing that there's any further emotion involved if that makes any sense at all. I mean he could have done something such as kiss me without even mentioning that he has any feelings for me at all. That is if he did like me, but he doesn't. So I really need to stop thinking that everything is a sign that he likes me.
No, him helping me up was not a sign he likes me. It was a friendly gesture, which I should appreciate for what it is- a friendly gesture and no more. And all the other things are just because he is a flirt. And all the nickname that he named me is just because he felt like it and not "queen bee-because he wants to show me love, but he's afraid I might sting". Hell no.
Never mind. I just hate being a believer.

Birthday Blues

Hello hello darlings.
I know I haven't been writing as much as I had hoped for, but things are quite hard to do, when literally every weekend this month I'm in a different place, and the weekends are usually when I have the time to dedicate to writing.
I wanna say that a lot has changed since the very beginning of this brand new year 2013, but in all honesty, and I try to be as honest as I can on here, nothing has changed.
What has happened since to make me think that something should have changed? The dear guy I liked just before this current one and I have gotten fairly close as friends, at which point he realized he might know the guy I like. I don't want him to know, but he's been insistent on finding out who the guy is, quite the curious case if you ask me. He's been trying to find out through a friend, and I don't know if I should tell him. He could really be hurt by me not trusting him with this and I do care about him, and about our quite fresh-out-of-the-oven, newborn of a friendship. Plus he could maybe help seeing as they are aquatinted, and share quite a few friends. On the other hand it could be a complete disaster to tell him. He could make it super awkward and even tell him, which could just make me want to dig a hole in the ground and lie in it forever more. So what do you do when you really want to give your trust to a person, but are terrified, and have quite a lot to lose? What would you do?
The first weekend I saw a thing I planned for quite some time, quite the event, play before my eyes. I think it was rather successful, but who's to tell? Mr. Guy was there, it was on Saturday. The Friday just beforehand there was a big party I didn't attend, because it's at a club I generally despise. He then asked me "you weren't there were you?" I replied, but it bothered me to know if he had honestly cared whether I was there or not, or was it another reason that he had asked this for. He asked me to sit next to him, and we had a little talk. It was nice.
This weekend, this past one, we went on a little overnight stay with that same group of friends that we went on the trip with just a month ago (him included). We sure had a good time. Not just because of him, not at all, but the entire population of people, with some new ones that weren't there last time, was just good company. We played some childhood games during which I fell because who am I without a few bruises? I don't know if it is because he's a genuinely good person or if it's 'cause he cares about me a smidge more than he cares about other people, but those two times I fell on my dear trusty booty he came running to me, hugged me from the back, placed his head on my shoulder and whispered "are you alright?" into my ear. Those moments when my heart literally melts, and can be later seen leaving red blood stain on the floor. No, it wasn't the fall, or my aching bum, nor were they the scratches that were left from the stones I glided on. It was he who made those stains. Yeah... I don't know why I wrote it aloud. I probably shouldn't have. I kinda gross myself out sometimes lately. Anywho... The highlight of his odd yet fuzz making behavior was when he touched my neck as if to massage it, and I told him "stop, I get chills when someone touches my neck", to which he then replied "so what happens if someone kisses your neck?" HELLLO THERE MR. SEXY PANTS. Yet again grossing myself out. I don't know if he meant it, because... Maybe it was just a random comment. It happens to strange people like him. But maybe just maybe he wants me to get chills because of him, and that is the reason he hasn't actually stopped touching my neck even after I told him that? The morning after that we went to an ice-skating rink. Despite the fact that it was freezing, it was so much fun! I missed skating. I haven't skated in about 3 and a half years, and I absolutely love it. It feels like it's my place; an ice rink for the ice queen... Kidding. He kept coming and holding my hand on the ice or appearing out of nowhere behind me, and hugging me, which almost made me piss myself of fear, but I came out alright, maybe a little more than alright.
And then yesterday we went out a group of friends. Most of them were drinking, 'cause that's what teenagers do these days. I didn't though. I don't find pleasure in gulping something that tastes like this kiss of death and acetone, and acting stupid after it. He was there, and he was drinking beer. Legitimate. He really wanted me to drink making me think it over too hard, and think he might want me to loosen up a little, but that's probably a big fat lie to myself. He was standing next to me and then asked where two girls disappeared to, and I don't know why, but I replied to that flirtatiously (why then? stupid!). He then smiled at me sweetly and stroked my cheek for no reason. Good thing my heart beats don't have a microphone attached to them, because he would have easily figure out I just want him sooo bad. I just wish I knew what he was thinking. I just don't know what he's thinking.
This weekend I'm going to see the college I will be attending next year. Hopeful that it's what I had imagined it being. There are amazing reviews about the program I'm going into (this leadership program), which makes me excited. It's a bit different to what all my friends are going to do, but it's interesting and it sounds a lot like me. I would love to be some kind of leader, even if around the people I'm surrounded with. A good one.
Other than that this month of January is always hard on me. It's my birthday month and with it come the "Birthday Blues". The kind of blues that settle down when you realize there is so much more you wanted to accomplish before you got to this age, but nothing has changed since last year. Last year I said to myself I gotta have a boyfriend before I'm 18, and look at it- 18 and still in the running. It's that kind of not shocking, very expected self criticism. Why couldn't you do better? Why are you still where you were this time a year ago? I surely will get out of it soon, and start loving my life all over again, because I have quite the loveliest life. I have a lot to thank God, my family, my friends, and this world for. I have the best of people around me, loving me. I have a roof over my head, and a fresh cooked meal everyday. And all those little things we usually never thank anyone for like... The ability to write down all this crap. I hope to be writing down some more fashionable things in the near future along with some news of the things I keep wanting to accomplish.
I love you all! Hope you have a great beginning to your year, and that you remember we all have so much to be happy for. <3 Roni J.