Saturday, November 10, 2012

Empty (October Empties)

Hello hello there girls.
I have been wanting to do an empties post for October for quite some time seeing as a lot of products of mine have slowly run out this month, and I thought it would be great if I got to share my reviews with you. Slightly, though, this topic has become more and more relevant.
I am feeling terribly empty because of the whole story with the guy a week ago. I know I said I wouldn't talk about it, but it's hard to ignore the subject (yeah I think I should start calling him the subject, to be honest), when the subject goes to the same school as me, and all sorts of other activities besides school. I really wish he could disappear. Not in a bad way, just in a good way. It really isn't his fault I'm uninteresting to him. Some people we're attracted to, and some we aren't. I guess I'm not his type considering his type is everything that hands it to him easily. Sorry for being sarcastic. He's a sweet guy and doesn't deserve me talking about him like that when no one is to blame here. I am attracted to him, the feeling is not mutual, and that's alright, and yet it manages to piss me off. So I wish for him to get a real good job overseas for some strange reason, and disappear. And all this why? Because I am already transparent to him, and it drives me nuts. It's not that I am invisible. I wouldn't say that. He does talk to me once in a while. In the romantic way, though, hell no.

Then I get filled up with emptiness, because I don't know what to feel for him. I can't feel good things for him, because that would be delusional. I can't feel attracted to him, because that is not going to pay off, unless it's supposed to pay off in hysteria over everything he says, or everything he does, not just to you, but to every girl in his surrounding. I cannot feel hatred for him, because I am just not that person. I think hating people in general is a waste of time and emotions. I can't blame him, because he's just not the one to blame if there's anyone at all. So what I'm left with is emptiness. Every time we talk, every time I see him, every time something of his pops up on Facebook, there's just emptiness, the kind that drives you mad.
And, after all those illusions that crushing on someone gives you, after all of his sweet words and gestures, after getting excited by everything related to him, I feel all the more empty. It filled up a big part of my days, and thoughts, and having that gone, having that gone is quite hard. It's quite emptying.

The truth is, the sad truth is, I haven't really changed. I keep going back to the same kind of guys with the same kind of intentions, and I never learn from my mistakes. I mean the same thing happened with Bob a year and a half ago, when I saw him kissing another girl, at another party, and this just repeats itself. It's quite my fault to be honest. I am so focused on what he looks like on the outside, and I know I am shallow, and I don't think it's a bad thing up until it hurts someone. In this case, I just hurt myself.

So what else have we emptied this month besides ourselves? 
1) Head and Shoulders' Dry Scalp Care With Almond Oil shampoo. Honestly, I loved this shampoo just a little too much. I have quite the dry scalp, unfortunately, and this really helped, for the first 5 months I've used it. Yes, I got a little carried away, and hence my hair got "immune" to it, and my dry scalp appeared again. I will say, though, that I will come back to it after a while of letting my hair rest from it a little, because the smell of it is lovely, and my hair felt great after washing it with it. It is over all a great product, and no, it doesn't make my hair more oily, it is targeted to work on the scalps moisture not oils. 

2) My Labello in pomegranate. Pomegranate is my favorite thing in this world probably, but the taste of this one, unlike the rest of the range, is just a little too soapy to put on the lips. I love the smell and the color, but the taste... Nah. It isn't the greatest thing if you really need to care for your lips, but if it's just the daily use thing, then it's quite alright.

3) My beloved L'Oreal conditioner I talked about only yesterday, and you guys know I'm already with a brand new bottle of it. It's made my hair so soft for the touch, and it smell like honey and beautiful, great, glorious things. 

4) My beloved Midnight Pomegranate body butter by Bath and Body Works. I like it a lot. It makes my skin real smooth, and smell great, because it IS my favorite scent from Bath and Body Works after all. I just put it on my legs before I go to bed and dream the best smelling dreams, and wake up with a smile on my face. I have a back up already, which is good, because it would be a shame not to. 

May our emptiness become happiness. XOXO Roni J.

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