Insecurities Cured (April Favorites)

Hello girls!
I'm sorry this took me quite some time, but I had to gather up what I wanted to say, I guess.
As part of falling out of love with Mr. Guy, I thought I should maybe take a step back and find someone else to fall in love with. Now, I made the mistake of falling for a new guy in order to fall out of love with the old one enough times. I don't mean falling in love with a new guy, not at all. What I mean is, I needed in fact to fall in love with myself. I got insecure, and started doubting my value, because if he doesn't want, who's to say someone will ever. I looked at myself in the mirror, and wasn't seeing me anymore, and that, my friends, is the biggest mistake I've done in a while.
Mr. Guy isn't to blame for this at all, if I were to blame I'd still be hanging from his line for a long long time, and I know the last post, The Sandbox, sounds like I was very angry, but the truth is I let the anger I had for myself come out like I was angry at him, and it just made it harder to let it go.
If I would have been angry at him I wouldn't have been able to slowly let go, because I still had some sort of feeling for him that's deeper than just any feeling I would have had for anybody else, which it shouldn't be, because the line between hating someone and loving them is very blurry, and you can easily step on it and cross it.
So I took my time off. I tried my best to not see him so much, because that just makes things harder, but I also told myself I wasn't going to avoid him if there's something I want to do and he's there. I just stopped looking for ways to see him more than needed.
I tried stripping myself from makeup a little bit, being confident and comfortable with the way I look naturally was important to me. I noticed that a lot more people said I look good every morning, and I can only guess it's not because I am horrible at putting make up on, but more because I was starting to glow from the inside. Starting to see I have value no matter what someone else might think.
I looked in the mirror every morning and instead of trying to hide my flaws I looked at my better features, and focused on them.
I'm not saying I'm a narcissist all of a sudden. It's not that I don't have flaws that I have to wake up to every morning, but these flaws make me special. They make me who I am, and they set me back from anybody else. I can now tell you that I know there's only one Roni J. and to be honest, I wouldn't want to have it any other way.
And Mr. Guy hasn't fallen for my charm and dazzling good looks, but I was shy around him and didn't present myself to him the  way I see myself, or my family, or my true friends, and that could be the true problem. But, then again, if I hadn't opened up to him after such a long time, and if I couldn't feel comfortable enough around him to present him with my true self, then I don't think he deserves it. Not in this stage of my life, I don't think so, at least.
So here are my favorites for this month, that made me a little more confident, that made me feel better when I was down. I hope you guys enjoy this! Don't forget to love yourself, because you are, in my opinion lovely and wonderful, and people deserve seeing you that way, and you deserve seeing yourself in the mirror and saying "Wow, my eyes look good today", "I love my hair this morning", and to step outside and feel comfortable in your own skin and just really ignore anyone that's jealous enough of you to say otherwise:

T.V Shows-
1) Cougar Town- I started watching from the very beginning because they are hilarious, and comedies like this make you  feel instantly better, no matter what's going on in your life.

2) New Girl- For the very same reason. It's going to be the season finale real soon, and I can see myself missing it so much. It instantly lights up my day, and I just love this show. 

3) Revolution- This is a less popular show, but I simply adore it. I love drama- action filled shows and movies like this one or like lost, that have mystery, and an amazing concept and something new to show. They are a little more serious, but they are simply addictive. This one's about what happens to the world when absolutely all the electricity stops working, out of nowhere. It talks a bit about human nature, and a bit about what we give the most importance to in our lives. It's an amazing show and I highly highly recommend seeing it.

4) The Cult- It's another good drama with a lot of action that I got into. It's a bit too much gore sometimes, but it's an incredibly interesting concept about a cult created by a T.V. show that people watch, and it's really insanely good.





Movies-

1) Total Recall- This month I have watched the least movies I have watched in a month in the past 4 years. I have only watched this one, and Lord Of The Flies that I have already seen and read multiple times. I still liked Total Recall a lot because it was a little bit like Inception, when you start losing the idea of what's reality, and what's the Rekall program. It's about a war torn world, and it's just really weird, and interesting, and action filled, and as you might be able to notice the pattern, I like action movies and shows, and this one stood out.







Youtubers-
1) Daily Grace- I am so late to jump on this bandwagon that I am ashamed of myself, but this girl cracked me up like crazy. I have only just subscribed to her and she's hilarious! She puts up so many videos that I have something to watch from her almost every day, and I just laugh so hard at everything she says and does.

2) What The Buck- He's a long time favorite. He makes me laugh with every single word he says, and he literally has the purest heart I have seen. He's just so true and honest and real that I love it.





Apps-
1) Fruit Ninja- I have just gotten addicted to this stupid game all over again. I can't deal with how much I play this crap.

2) Instagram- I kinda left it for a while, but now I'm hooked onto it all over again. I love it.













Websites-
1) Neopets- God I'M SORRY! I didn't mean to be like this, and I know I'm 18 and it's time I got over my childhood obsessions, but we were in chem class and had no work to do so me and my friend decided to reminisce, and we got into Neopets, and I'm addicted. I'm sorry there's really no excuse for what I've done.




Computer Games-
1) Sims 3- Another childhood addiction I have re-discovered, and I freaking love it, and I have nothing more to say about this game other than it's freaking fantabulous!





Piece Of Jewelery-
1) This Necklace- Was gifted to my sister a few years ago and she never wore it so I took it like two weeks ago, and I absolutely love it. It is so unique and gorgeous. Wish I knew where it's from... Sorry.






Songs-
1) Hurricane by Bridgit Mendler- Sweet fun good-feel song. It's a bit sad if you listen closely, but It's just fun to listen to.

2) No Cure by Meghan Hilty- This song was there for the harder part of the month, the more heart broken part of the month. But it got me through heart break by just knowing almost exactly how I felt.

3) Leave Your Boyfriends Behind by Leona Naess- This song is just about the fun youthful girly times I've had the past few weeks. I was in a really funny party where everybody except me was drunk, and a ton of guys hit on me and I started playing jokes on them telling them I'm from a different country and all sorts of funny crap they believed, and the next day we celebrated my friend's 18th birthday on a yacht dancing and swimming, and having the best time of our lives, and I went to the beach for the first time this year, and this is what I'm about now. This song describes this perfectly. This is the true favorite this month.






4) I Love It by Icon Pop- Was playing on the yacht, and in the party I went to and will remind me of the good times every time I listen to it. I don't care. I love it.

That's all sweeties. Have a great month of may. <3 XOXO Roni J.

Oblividious Part 2

Hello there pretty girl!
How's your weekend starting? Mine started literally like a dream. I woke up soooo late today that it was just so recharging and nice. Anyways I thought you guys might like to hear about my favorite makeup and beauty gurus on YouTube just like I did the one for the fashion and style gurus. I hope you like it!
This time I'm not going to grade them for the simple fact that it's just really complicated.
So here are the beauty gurus of choice:

1. The lovely, the beautiful, Allthatglitters21, Elle Fowler. I love her videos. She's so so sweet and her taste in books (yes, books) is simply divine! Most likely that if you're interested in the YouTube beauty community you already know Elle, but still. She also has a vloging channel called EllesGlitterGossip that I also love.

2.  Essiebutton's sweet Estee. This girl is the funniest thing I have ever seen and she always brightens my days with her cute make up videos and her lovely mailman updates (??). She is gorgeous as well as hilarious! Very much recommended!  Isn't she just so darn cute?







3. The third beauty guru that I love is Fleur from fleurdeforce and fleurdevlog. She is simply the sweetest girl. She is so genuine and honest, and she does her best to upload as much as she can, and every one of her beauty videos and vlogs are just adorable. She is GORGEOUS!
4. Next is Elle's just as good looking sister, Blair or Juicystar07 and otherjuicystar07 on YouTube. She's sweet and might be a little in you face, but I think she's just fun to watch and she makes me giggle, and that's what really matters in life right? Doesn't the scenery of the picture look familiar from anywhere *cough*look*cough*up*cough*.
5. Next up is the FABULOSA Kandee Johnson. She is sooooo cute and inspiring and strong, and I simply love her videos (especially the Halloween tutorials! They're so so GOOD). Her screen name or YouTube channel is very conveniently called KandeeJohnson, so that is a plus side (? What the heavy gravy am I talking about??).

6.  The most adorable, sweet, cute girl out of them all (no offense to all the other fabulous ladies here) is Kayle from Letsmakeitup1. Not only is she really the sweetest thing I have ever seen in my life, but her hair tutorials are to die for, really professional and well explained. I wish I could style my hair like she can, but even though I can't it's just fun to make believe.
7. Another very sweet girl is Macbarbie07's Bethany. To be honest I haven't been subscribed to her for long, but from what I have already seen I really really do like her. She's sweet and creative, and that's always nice, right?

8. Now here's another girl I haven't been subscribed to for long, but she's so sweet. She answers as many comments as possible and really does know her stuff. She knows litterally everything about makeup: finishes, colors, brands. She's crazy and funny and she's Rachel from Makeupneversleeps.

9. Next is the ever so lovely Michelle Phan who is also very conveniently called MichellePhan on YouTube which is just lovely. Her DIY's are simply phenomenal, her makeup looks sweet and young, and her song choices are spectacular. Love this girl!

10. The lovely, sweet, adorable, and sweet (again) Missglamorazzi   and the Thegridmonster, dear dear Ingrid. I have no words to describe this girl. She can just brighten my day any day.

11. The next girl is MissJenFABULOUS's Jen. Not only is her name FABULOUS, but so is she. Punny. Get it?!.... Never mind. Her blog I think is called Polish and Pearls or something and it is FABULOUS as well.

12. Don't quit on me quite yet my dear dear Fashionistas. NikkiPhillipi's next and this girl is worth watching. Her ask Nikki segment is so good. This girl really has some values, which are so very important even if not agreed upon, and I personally agree with hers so she is just lovely and so entertaining.
13. Pixi2woo's Tanya is just a sweet English girl. I love her tutorials. They are so wearable and pretty and I'm just jealous of her look.
14. Fourteen is a 2 in one package deal. Nick and Sam from Pixiwoo are sisters that are both makeup artists. Their tutorials are so professional and I simply adore their crazy makeup looks that they some times do on the spot. They look so editorial and simply, well, as I've said before, professional.

15. Dear mother of pearl we've come to the final guru. I am so running out of ways to describe these girls and they deserve so much more to be said about them, but I just.... I haven't enough words. The next girl is dear dear Anna from Thestylediet, that I have recently become addicted to. She's just so sweet and genuine and I totally adore her. She's a role model for me.
I hope that this was informative and helpful to all of you girlies, and I am so sorry this is so long, but this is practically like watching T.V. for me. I love all of these girls, and all of you of course!
Have a great week! Hope  this wasn't too much of a beautiful disaster. Again with the puns, I have to stop this. XOXO Roni J.

Oblividious

Hey there fashionistas,

today I wanted to talk to you about a word that's very important in my opinion:

Oblivious: Lacking active conscious, knowledge or awareness. 

I think a lot of times we're oblivious to our surroundings, to the people around us, and to things we have no interest in seeing. Sometimes we can be so oblivious that we can't even see what we want or need.
Now the thing I want you to remember is to never be oblivious, and, if there's ever a moment when you feel like you are "lacking active conscious, knowledge or information", fix it. Look around to see if a friend, or just another girl you know needs help, or needs a little bit attention from someone. I have been trying to be better about this lately, trying not to judge someone in the need of a little bit more attention than any other person.
Anyways now for the more fashion related part of the post. As you may probably not know, I don't have a T.V. at home and haven't had one since two and a half, almost three years ago. Youtube channels are my T.V. series basically. The reason this is called Oblividious is because I wanted to show you the girls I'm subscribed to on youtube that I love their fashion taste and videos, and that I literally spend hours and hours listening to, and getting inspired by.

1.Ranked high up in number one on the people that I love is my biggest inspiration, Fashionencounters. Best Videos, best taste, so sweet, so pretty and just angelic Jenn. She used to do her videos with Sarah which is also gorgeous, but now I think they only do their tumbler together. I swear these girls couldn't have done better videos so check them out!

2. Ranked as a close second I would very much LOVE it if you check out  Barbara from Thepersianbabe. She isn't only the sweetest most devoted girl, she's also gorgeous and has an amazing fashion sense that makes your heart melt. She makes great videos that are no doubt a must watch! She make mostly fashion and makeup related videos, and I am simply addicted.


  Also in second place is the gorgeous Chriselle from Chrisellelim that has so many styling tips and trick I go bananas for every video she puts up as if I were a hungry monkey in a field of banana trees. She's a gorgeous young stylist with a taste so classy you will feel like a pearl, after using her advice.

3. Tied up for three are the three gorgeous ladies: Patricia from Britpopprincess, Nia from NiaSays, and Sammy from Beautycrush. All are gorgeous, British (or living at the moment in Britain), fashionable ladies that float my boat and rock my socks. Great inspiring videos from all on our most sinful pleasure: FASHION. All of their tastes very between unique, rocker, girly and classy. They make every stinking piece work in a way only they know.

4. In fourth place are the gorgeous Alexa from Smokeypinkleopard, Arden from ARose186, Zoe from Zoella280390, Suzi from StyleSuzi, the two fabulous Steph and Melisa from Thefashioncitizen, and the lovely Becca from voussontbeauetbelle. Each of them is stunning in her own way and addictive in her own way. All equally great!


I hope you've enjoyed this little tour through youtube's best, most gorgeous ladies, and that you really do remember not to be oblivious to yourselves nor to others in your surroundings! Love you girlies! Happy mothers' day!

   

Let's finish the day with this gorgeous song! Successful eventful week to us all!